Remember last preview article where we said we were ok with you just using CTRL+F to find yourself in the article without actually reading it? Yeah, that was a major lie, it actually hurt our feelings a lot. So to combat this, we are going to put a bunch of dots (Like J..oh.n S.m.Ith) between all the letters in your names so you can't use CTRL+F easily to find yourself. If you decide to use some sort of text editing trick to still use CTRL+F to find yourself, that is perfectly OK, we at the KlingKlang times reward that sort of creative thinking (Otherwise we'd write your names Like JJJJOOOOHHHHNNN SMMMIIITTTHHH or just misspell them and you'd have a much harder time!).
DIFFICULTY RANKING
Before we start talking about the players, let first make an extremely broad predicition about the difficulty of the regional without really thinking about it too much.
Now, before you say "Wow, only a 3/5! You're really sleeping on AUS!" you should realize that this rating is totally meaningless. And not just because random difficultly rankings are inherently meaningless either! No this rating is meaningless because I haven't properly established the relative value of a mega kangaskhan versus a Landorus-T. Maybe you're thinking "Oh, it's obvious that it's a simple 1 to 1! 3/5! Riot!" but if I told you that your new haircut was a 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩/10, woould you consider that a perfect score? Hell no! because the shit emoji is understood to not just carry the value of 1, and likewise it's pretty obvious that a Mega Kang is not exactly equal to a Landorus T. So with that in mind, here is the relative weight between Mega Kangs and Landorus-T that is necessary to understand this ranking
If you actually calculated the actual difficulty using this, congratulations, you're a frickin nerd
COMPREHENSIVE PREVIEW
For too long, VGC previews have been plagued with totally subjective, and really loosey-goosey preview articles. Not any longer! This article uses a complex deep learning algorithm to predict exactly how many wins every player at this regional will receive in the 8 rounds of swiss. Without Further ado, here are the results!
HUGE LOSERS
Anyone who didn't check in before I wrote this. Come on, why are relying on the last minute check in? You're either working on your team last minute, arrived late, or are just lazy and as a result will have to wake up early and be sleep deprived. Anyway, we think you will do terrible, and you should feel bad.
CREAM OF THE CROP (7+ wins)
These players got really lucky and got high numbers from the random number generator I used to make this article have demonstrated tremendous amounts of success, and will surely be rewarded with a minimum of 7+ wins. Some people whose names I recognize, fix this with a superlative explaining how good they are bigly accomplished players in this group include
Z.uy..ee L.ou [AU]: Ok, we're going to assume this is Z.o..e L..ou, the previous champion of AUS internationals. The fact that our deep learning algorithm chose the previous winner to have 7+ wins this year despite registering under a slightly different name shows just how reliable our system is. If our assumption is wrong then we will publish a correction article that no one will read anyway
Ca..rs.o...n C.o.nf...er [US]: Clearly, the algorithm also takes into account recent success as well, demonstrating how reliable and accurate it is. Ca..rs.on is coming off a nice international finish that I'm too lazy too luck up the exact placing for, so look for him to also finish this event with a solid finish but not quite a solid enough finish for me to remember his exact placing.
G..iov.a.nn.i C..os.t.a [US]: Alright we normally like to rip on the people we put in our preview articles, but G..i..o is amazing for this community and makes great videos so major props to him! We feel a little bad that we probably cursed him with this preview, but I am just a slave to the algorithm, I have to post what it gives me.
N..ich.o.l.as B.i.ng..h.am [AU]: This guy top cut with a magikarp, I don't know what else I have to say. Maybe he'll top cut with another shit mon this year like seedot or tapu fini.
who are these people? OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS CATEGORY
Ar.v.el S.end.j.ojo [ID]
E.m.ma Wil.li.ams [AU]
R.ya.n H.erc.us [AU]
G.l.en Wh.eel.er [AU]
S.eb Th.al.is [AU]
B.r..a.dl.ey Pr.it.ch.a...rd [AU]
Ad.n..an A.vd.ic [AU]
St.ev.en S.h.i [AU]
Ro.be.rt W.hi.te.hi.ll [AU]
T.o.ny N.g.uy.en [AU]
G.ua.n-M.in Li [TW]
L.u.ke I.ue.le [AU]
I.va.n R.e.y J.ing.co [PH]
Za.ch..a.ry Ma.r.ks [AU]
H...a.mis.h T.r.ant.er [AU]
P.et.e.r T.h.o.mp..s.on [AU]
J..a.v.i.er Se.ñ.or.e.na [ES]
THE BEST OF THE REST (6+ wins)
These players didn't get quite as lucky as the previous group, but perhaps they will benefit from the lack of pressure of not being in the top group. These players could easily make cut if they get just a few breaks that our algorithm couldn't predict and include:
K.iyo.sh.i.ro A.ra.i [JP]: Our first Japanese player, our Algorithm doesn't seem to think Japan is particularly strong at this event, but you can never sleep on Japan!
A..nd.r.ea Di F..ra.nc.es.co [IT]: I feel like I've seen this name before finishing well but I don't remember where. Anyway he's Italian so he is definitely a safe pick to do well at this event
OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS GROUP
F.e.de..ri.co Tu..ra.no [AR]
Is.a.a.c L.am [NZ]
Ma.lc.o.l.m Ma.c.ke.l.lar [AU]
G..un.t.u.r P..ra.b.o.wo [ID]
O.n H.an.g T..s.u.i [HK]
E.ri.c V.o [AU]
Ca.me.r.on D.im.ond [AU]
S.e.an T.ho.r.pe [AU]
E.v.a.n B.oy.l.e [AU]
G.r.if.f.in C.og.g.in [AU]
J.es..s..e B.ea.rd [AU]
E.man.u.e.le B.e.rm..an.i [AU]
K....ei...th S. T..al..on
C.hr..i.st.oph.er E.ga.n [AU]
K.ev.in P.al.-.i.n.g [AU]
R..h.y.s Da.v.ie.s [GB]
ABOVE AVERAGE (5+ wins)
These players are destined to have an OK, but ultimately disappointing finish at Sydney. Some notable members of this list include:
A.lb.e.r..to L.ar.a [US]: Is there a maximum for amount of CP? At this rate A...lb.er.to is on Pace to snowball well into 2023, and he's in the hunt to get even more CP at this event! God help us all!
S.im..o.n.e S..a.n.vi.t.o [IT]: Coming off an internationals win, it looks like whoever gibed (gobe? gabe? gobben? idk whatever the past tense of gibe is) him his team this time wasn't quite as good of a teambuilder. In any case, he still is looking at a solid finish and he finished roughly 0.6 points higher in the algorithm than his rival ..Y,,ur.i so thats nice!
Al.e.s.s.io Y,ur.i B.os.c.he.t..to [IT]: Ok I know these rankings mean absolutely nothing but I bet it stings a little to know that you finished 0.6 points behind S..an.v.y
P.hi....l.ip Ng..u.ye.n [AU]: A strong Austrailian player, b..oo.mgu..y may not have had quite the placing in our rankings he would have hoped, but hey, at least its a respectable placing!
OTHER PLAYERS IN THIS CATEGORY
Si.mon C.ha.n [AU]
N.a.s.h H..a.w.nt [AU]
G.ra.h.a.m A.me.d.ee [AU]
J..a.m.e.s F..ar.r.ug.ia [AU]
T.s.z H.in L.a.m [HK]
Ch.ri.s G.iag.oz.og.l.ou [AU]
Ch.ri.st.o.pher H.igg.ins [GB]
M.a.r.t.in M.uno.z [CL]
Y..ok.o T.ag.uma [SG]
Sa,ma,nt.ha D.ig.g.i.n.es [AU]
A.li.s.t.er Sa.ndo..ver [AU]
S.tu..a.rt R.u.th..er.fo.rd [AU]
K.en.n.y C.h.a.n [AU]
D.a.ic.h.i K.u..m.a.b..e [JP]
St.ep.h.en J.ac..o.bs [AU]
L.ew.is Fo.o.ng [MY]
T.L. TS.A.N.G [HK]
T.OM.O.YA K.IM.U.RA [JP]
K..ENY.A K.O.DER.A [JP]
P.au.l Am.ed.ee [AU]
J.am.e.s R..o.u.se [AU]
Vi.n.c.ent M.ont.a.l.vo [US]
M.ar.k. D.i.c.k.in..so.n [AU]
Be..n.j..a.min M.ay.ne [AU]
B.a.il.ey O.w..e.n [AU]
J.a..k.e Wa..rr..en [AU]
D.er...e.k P...en.g [AU]
D.am.on M.ur.d.och [AU]
L.UO L.I J.U [TW]
THESE GUYS WILL DROP MID TOURNAMENT UNREMARKABLY (2-4+ wins)
These players are likely to be a little bit upset after their finishes, and will probably complain about the hax a lot so I'd recommend avoiding talking to them after the event because they probably dropped in disgrace and will be a bit tilted. Some Notable Members of this list
RIP North American Travel Award Winners:
A.s..ht.on C.o.x [US]
S..t.e.p.h.en M.e.a [US]
A..l.e.x U.n.d.e.r.h.i...ll [US]
Ma.t.t T..i.d.d [CA]
J.er..em.y Ro.dr..ig.ue.s [US]
OUCH! More than HALF of the US stipend award winners get filtered out into this category. Land of the Free am I right?
A..le.x G.o.me..z [ES]: After being cursed with the smart money on another site's article, it appears that A..le.x is unfortunately doomed for an early exit. I am amazed that our algorithm was able to correctly identify the existence of the smart money curse and notice that even such a strong player like A..le.x is not immune to this.
OTHER PLAYERS WHO SCRUBBED OUT
J.a.y. T.y..r.r.e.ll [AU]
C.ol.i.n D.av..i.es [AU]
J.e.ns A.rn.e M.æk.in.e.n [NO]
L.ia.m Gi.lb.e.r..t [AU]
D..y.l.an C..a.r.ri..gg [AU]
P.a..ul R.u..iz [EC]
E..v.a.n B.a..t.es [US]
G...O.M..I N.A..O.Y.A [JP]
M.a..rt.i.n L..a.ru.m.be [AU]
L.uk..e H.e.y [AU]
T.i..m.ot.hy Go..ol..ey [AU]
Ju..li..en A.th..ave [AU]
Z.a.c C.o.r.r.i.gan [AU]
S.ho...t.a M.iy.a..ji [JP]
D..an...ie.l W..al.ke.r [AU]
A..nu.bh.a.v B.i.sw..as [AU]
E.li.z..a.be.th H.om..e.n [US]
A..rk.i.e O..w.e.n [AU]
C..el.i.ne G.ri.ma [AU]
K.oj.i M.or..i.mo.to [JP]
B.ri.a.n A.me..d.ee [AU]
K.a.rl A.ng..el.o A.qu..i.no [PH]
De..n.a.ysh S.el.vak.k.um.ar [AU]
A.sh.l.e.y Sp.ri.n.ge.tt [AU]
Z.ar..if A..ym.an [MY]
C.h.r..i.s L.y...el.l [AU]
J..o..se B.ri.c..e.no [US]
K.ha..l.id A.lh.u.r.a.i.z [AE]
J.am.e.s T.ig..a.ni [AU]
L.a...u.re.n H..o.l.l.ow.ay [AU]
P.e..t.e.r N.ak.h.o.ul [AU]
D.a.n.i..e.l C.ar.r.o.ll [GB]
C.u..r.t.i.s R.i.d.in.g.s [AU]
J.e.n.s.e.n C..h.e..n [AU]
B.i..l.l W.a.n.g [AU]
H.ar...r.i.s.on N.el.s..on P.er.r.y [AU]
K.i.k.u.ch.i K.a.o..r.i [JP]
J..a.v.i.er V..a.l.d.es [CL]
J..a.c.k.s.on L.ak..ey [AU]
L..i.a.m S...te.w.a.rt [AU]
W.i..l.l Y.un..g [AU]
A...l.e.s.sio V...i.nc.i.g.u.e.r.ra [IT]
K..w.o.k H..a.n.g K.o [HK]
A..n.d.r.ew D..a.s [AU]
S.a.m H..u.g.h.es [AU]
Eu...ge.n.e T.a.n [SG]
M.a...rt.i.n T.a.n [SG]
J...a.c.ks.on M..a.y.be..r.ry [AU]
CONSIDER SWTICHING TO SHINY HUNTING (0-1+ wins)
These players will perform terribly, barely even mustering up a win in some cases. Just look at these guys and their miserable abilities to get good numbers in a random number generator. play pokemon well wait whats the difference?
WAIT REALLY
E..d.u.a.r.do C.u..n.ha [PT]
S..a.m P...a.nd.el.i.s [AU]
A.r.a.s.h O..mm.a.t.i [IT]
C...h.ri.s.t.o.p.her K.a.n [AU]
B..ar.r.y A.n..de.r.s.on [GB]
Ja.mi.e Bo..y.t [GB]
L.u.ke. Cu.r.ta.le [AU]
N.i..c.o D..a.v.i.de C.og.ne.t.t.a [IT]
Wow, there's a lot of surprising names on this list, I wonder what the algorithm is thinking. oh shit i made a spelling error in one of the functions all the placings are backwards but its too late I need to publish this In any case, we are certain in the algorithms reliability, so it looks like these normally strong players will be in for a bit of a rough time this year in Sydney.
OTHER MISERABLE SCRUBS
J.o.s.e..ph H..o.r.s.f.i.e.ld [AU]
Z..o.l.t.an Sn..e.ad [AU]
S...im.o.n K..o..n.s.ti [AU]
a..r.is k..a.t.s.i.k.is [AU]
T..A.I.S.E.I M.OR....IK.AW.A [JP]
K.a L..o.k. L..e.e [HK]
D..o.ri.an Q..u.iñ..o.ne.z [PE]
D..a.vid Gi.ll...et..t [AU]
B..e.n d.e R...id.d.er [AU]
D..u.c Ma..c [AU]
C..h.i.n.g Y.an.g L.ai [HK]
Y.u..ki K.o.no [AU]
Z.h.i S.h..en.g T.a.y [SG]
J..e.sse Wi..l.s.o.ne [AU]
J..o.s.h.ua W...a.r.e [AU]
D..i.e.go Ferr.eira [CL]
A.n.g W..e.i W..e.n [SG]
D...a.vi.d.e S..p.e.ra.ti [IT]
J..o.s.hu.a C..a.l.li.s.ter [AU]
he..n.ry r..i.c.h [AU]
M..e.lv.i.n K..e.h [SG]
L..o.ch.ie.l C..a.me.r.on [AU]
m...a.x l.. a.ng.e.ns.i..e.p.en [AU]
B..e.n V.o.ss [AU]
E..l.i.s.e M..c.C.a.be [AU]
J..i.r.a.w.iw.at T...h.i.t.a.s.i.ri [TH]
E..i.k.e M..a.r.vi.n G..il.c.h.er [DE]
Ma..t.t.h.ew S..i.l.i.w.an [ID]
C...h.e.ls.ea T.an [SG]
L..i.a.m F...a.l.l.s [AU]
S..a.m.u.el F...ri.e.nd [AU]
P...a.ul T..ay.lor [AU]
Me.a..g.h.an Ra..tt..le [AU]
J..am..es K..a.t.sa.r.os [AU]
B.ra.id.y..n P.s.ai..la [AU]
C..o.n.n.or Cr..oe.se [AU]
B..r.e.n.dan R..ob.e.son [AU]
Y..a.ng.-.J..i.e H..u.a.ng [TW]
SMART MONEY: Tony Nguyen [AU]
Congratulations Tony! You are the chosen one to bear the cross of the smart money. The good news is that you can actually find your name using CTRL+F quite easily, the bad news is that you must bear the curse of smart money for the entire regional. May God have mercy on your soul!
STUPID MONEY: Nico Davide Cognetta [IT]
In addition to Smart Money, our algorithm also predicts a Stupid Money: The player it believe will finish last in this event. I want to stress that this was not a close call at all, the algorithm is EXTREMELY sure that Nico Davide Cognetta will finish last in this event. The scores range from 0-8, and he received a 0.004, more than 10 times lower than the next lowest player. We don't have any precedent for a Stupid Money Blessing to counteract the Smart Money Curse, but in any case things are looking either really really good for Nico Davide Cognetta or really really bad depending on which superstition you subscribe to.
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